I will try to walk a blameless path,but how i need your help,especially in my own home,where i long to act as i should.Help me to refuse the low and vulgar things;help me to abhor all crooked deals of every kind,to have no part in them. I will reject all selfishness and stay away from every evil.
It is hard to describe what makes porn so desirable. What is it about porn that makes it arousing? At first glance, it would seem that nude bodies are themselves arousing, but this is not strictly the case. Imagine a still photograph of a nude woman posed in florescent light, making her skin glow with a sickly greenish-blue tint, her face devoid of any makeup, expressionless, her posture limp; she is standing in full profile, devoid of any emotion. There is nothing arousing about this image. The same woman could instead be posed erotically, her eyes burning as she pulls away her clothes, her body a landscape of curves and shadows. Indeed, eroticism need no imagery: a female voice urging you to touch yourself as she describes her body is arousing. So what's the deal?
The quality that makes something arousing is encased in the opportunity for sex. Watching (or hearing) others have sex makes us think that we can have sex, and this is arousing. Watching a woman strip off her clothes makes us think she wants to have sex with us, which makes us aroused. Having a woman describe sex, or having sex with us, is arousing.
Do we (I am speaking for all men) have any control over this arousal? In other words, is it reflexive or is it learned? I am inclined to think it is reflexive. This is not to say we are devoid of self control; rather, it is how we deal with arousal that defines our control over our behavior. The fact is, we are generally wired to seek out that which feels good and avoid that which feels bad. Only through self control can we enable ourselves to restrain our passions and tolerate discomforts. And so we enter the great battle of self control, a battle that is at the center of this blog.
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